My favourite story is actually one that someone else told me while I was pregnant. She had just finished getting her oldest daughter ready for her first dance and said she could remember back to when she had breastfed her. During one night feeding while the entire house was dark and it was just them she said "one day I will be getting you ready for your first dance but that is a far way off...". Makes you think of all of the special moments only the two of you can share when you breastfeed.


I remember what I felt like when I breastfed my daughter for the first time. It wasn't the beautiful, life changing moment I thought it would be. Rather it was awkard and painful. I had no clue what I was supposed to do and neither did she. I fumbled through the first weeks in a daze, partly from being sleep deprived and partly because I found being a mother for the first time very overwhelming. Here was this tiny baby who needed me in order to survive. My body had changed in too numerous ways to mention and I was at her beck and call 24 hrs a day. Previously I had been very independant and I found it difficult to put my life on hold for her.

Then fast forward to the birth of my second child. I was looking so forward to breastfeeding her. I knew that it would take a bit of an adjustment period in the begining but I now knew the rewards of nurturing my child through breastfeeding. I had not so distant memories of the coos and smiles my first daughter had given my while breastfeeding and I couldn't wait to experience that again. I couldn't wait to experience the joy I felt knowing that only I could nurture her with food that was made just for her. The second time was much easier then the first.

Then after the birth of my third and last baby I experience pangs of sadness. I knew she would be my last baby and so I wanted to hang on to every minute, every hour I spent breastfeeding her. I loved knowing that I could calm her by simplying breastfeeding her. I loved knowing she was growing in my arms as I fed her. Where with my first I felt overwhelmed by her dependance on me, I was dreading the day when my last daughter decided she didn't need my milk to soothe and calm her anymore. With my first I longed for my independance, yet with my last I cherised the days when all she needed was to be held in my arms.

Now my "baby" is 4 and my eldest is 11 and breastfeeding is in the distant past. I remember how I felt so overwhelmed in the begining with my first daughter, how some days it felt like all I did was breastfeed. Now it has been so much longer since I held and fed a baby at my breast that it has really put in to perspective for me what a short time we truly have with our babies!